It's a man's occupation, it's a career and it's an opportunity, all at once. Take on the hottest, most prestigious profession of today: International Trade. Are you wasting away in an office, going bald and entertaining yourself by dropping pencils so your fat secretary bends over? You could be in the money, living an adventure. In today's times with women working in the office and men wearing pastels, pinks and eye shadow, it's vital you reaffirm your masculinity at every opportunity. Hi, I'm Jeremy Robard with some important information about masculinity and you. How long has it been since you've gone at top speed in a powerboat with two blondes in bikinis? Well that's too long. I'm an American and you're not! So f***ing die! He's wrestling the chopper down! Shoot him! Then the liberals turned their backs on our hero. Let's do some killing! Let's kill for the kids!Īfter I torched those villages and raped all those schoolgirls, I just can't seem to get those images out of my head! Goodnight, b*tches! I'll kill him before he screams! Now, he's having flashbacks and someone's going to pay. Tim gave everything he had to our country. Not a cheap handjob in a seedy massage parlor. And passion is a spiritual connection between two beautiful people. I mean, I think we all know love comes from the heart. Just broadcasting from a mall and pretending to be getting an erotic massage. Uh, that was our roving reporter, Fernando Martinez. Really incredible! Hey baby, I think I'm getting a little stress again! Come here! Asians, the Swedes, the little Mexican girl. Boy, do I know that! All the ethnicities. But this is business class, baby! This is 1984. You see, we waste so much of our love when you make an abstract painting on her face, or a map of the Falkland Islands on your stomach, on a lonely night. But from the power and the passion of a load of baby oil, and a woman to relax you. Where do you think babies come from, Lionel? Not from therapy, buddy.
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It's fantastic! Boy, I mean these girls really know how to relax you! Baby! Let's see what's up with our roving reporter, Fernando Martinez, out there in the field, discovering love firsthand. Written on the heart, tattooed on the loins. For skulls on fire or Egyptian symbols of fertility, come to Cinder Beast Tattoos.
And some of them have been in the joint so you know they have experience. Or you want a tattoo of a mermaid and a gorilla? Or a man, slaying a dragon with his penis.
You like roses? Or barbed wire? Or maybe you love someone so much, you want their name on your ass for all eternity. And you realize this is, how you say, a metaphor for the first sexual experience. Or the time you play on the railroad tracks with your slow brother and he doesn't get out of the way in time. There are things that last forever, like a paper degree. And speaking of souls, our very own Fernando is broadcasting live at Cinder Beast Tattoo at Vice Point. That was more powerful than any chemical that could course through your veins. Fernando will find you something to cuddle with. And plus, they don't taste like real pig. But I date an Italian girl and she no like it.
They have lots of turtles here! Fernando likes guinea pigs. Or maybe you are slow, like your mom was exposed to DDT, and you like a pet turtle. Like a kitten that is half-off when you stop at the Doggy-Style Pet Store, downtown. You need a woman with big hips that bear the child that will someday rise up against you, and fight you to the death." So I throw the puppy away, and take the wench by the hair.įernando, what the hell are you talking about? And when I feel better, I say, "Fernando, you don't need a puppy anymore. When I get emotional, I get a puppy, Lionel.
Right now, I broadcast live from Doggy-Style Pet Store. You really are sounding like the estrogen is taking over. Right now, to prove how much our sales team thinks of keeping our listeners, here's Fernando at Doggy-Style Pets. Hey, Vic, I know you cared about her, man. No one ever really did much for me before.
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